Tag Archives: funny

“Most people are dead. Did you know that? It’s true, out of all the people that ever were, almost all of them are dead.”

-- Louis C.K.
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“My life is an open book. But it is very poorly written and I die in the end.”

-Anonymous
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“I would like to think I will die a heroic death, but it’s more likely I’ll trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.”

- Unknown
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“The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.”

- Oscar Wilde
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“At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page, and if I’m not there, I carry on as usual.”

- Patrick Moore
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“I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.”

- Winston Churchill
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