Tag Archives: Funny Death Jokes

“Alas, I am dying beyond my means.”

- Oscar Wilde
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“If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?”

- George Carlin
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“Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.”

- Hector Berlioz
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“He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.”

- H.H. Munro
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A Tombstone under a Tree Reads:

"Here lies an atheist, all dressed up and no place to go." - Unknown
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Adventurous Wilson Mizner is reported to have said to a priest just before he died:

"Why should I talk to you? I've just been talking to your boss."
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