The Paddle Out: Grief & Healing After Death

Paddle Out: 3 Tips for a Cathartic Grieving Ceremony

Credit: utotherescue.blogspot.com

Certain stages of the grieving process can feel like trudging through mud. You motivate yourself to move one foot forward, only to end up in grief that feels just as heavy and indistinct. One of the most important initial steps in the process can be simply waking yourself up from your grief – and for that we suggest benefiting from the enigmatic, healing properties of water.

In the wake of the recent Isla Vista, California shootings, the UCSB surf team organized a memorial “Paddle Out” for community members to gather in the water in a circle with flowers, words to be spoken in memoriam — a moment to face their grief and release it. Here are three tips for planning your own “Paddle Out”:

1) Water: The Inimitable Element
You don’t need thousands of people to have your own Paddle Out, but you’ll need a body of water. Go poolside, if you must!

IV Memorial Paddle Out from Julia Olson on Vimeo.

2) Flowers for Celebration
Make leis, headbands or simply bring a bouquet. However, make sure you bring something earth-friendly to toss into the sea with the others.

The UCSB Paddle Out.
(Credit: Max Fernbacher)

3) Prepare a Song or Chant
The ocean’s a noisy place, so collaborate with attendees in advance about choosing a poem, song or chant you can prepare beforehand and recite together. The effect will be resonating!

What would you add to a Paddle Out ceremony? We look forward to your comments below.

More “Practical Tips”:

• Estate Planning After Death: The Questions to Ask
• Planning a Life Celebration: Memorial Runner
• Estate Planning: How can you ease the uncertainties that can arise with settling an estate?