What can the Funeral Consumers Alliance do for you? An Interview with Marjorie Bridges

Today SevenPonds talks with Marjorie Bridges, who has been an active volunteer with Funeral Consumers Alliance of San Mateo and Santa Clara Counties for 15 years. A former president of the FCA and its sister non-profit, Funeral Education Foundation, lately she has served as president of FCA of California and secretary of the national FCA board. 

Credit: http://www.fcapeninsula.org

Kimberly: Please tell us more about the local chapter of the FCA that we have here.

Marjorie: We are a society based out of San Mateo and the Santa Clara Valley. Recently, we have expanded to the East-Bay as well. People from all over the bay are always welcome to come over here and take any of our brochures or join in our meetings. Our most-recent news letter explains that we are going to have a vote on April 27th in the annual meeting to try and rename ourselves as the ‘Bay Area Funeral Consumers Association’.

Kimberly: What is the mission of the FCA?

Marjorie: We are here to provide education and guidance to the general public so that they can make simple, dignified and affordable funeral arrangements. We are also a consumer advocate. We try to inform people about mortuaries and the funeral business.

People from all over the bay are always welcome to come over here and take any of our brochures or join in our meetings.

We deal with complaints and have a database for members in which we can record their wishes for end of life arrangements. We also inform hospices and social workers about our existence and keep in touch with them if they need to provide help for people who want to make plans.

We have annual meetings, elections and information for members and anyone else who wants to come. It is absolutely free and we always have refreshments. Our most recent meeting is open to the public and it will be held at the Public Library in Los Altos on April 27th at 1:00pm.

Credit: www.fcapeninsula.org

Kimberly: What projects are the FCA currently working on?

Marjorie: We are trying to help the coast-side land trust establish a green cemetery along highway 1, four miles south of Half Moon Bay. We are always involved in creating surveys that compare prices for funerary and memorial services on our website at www.fcapeninsula.org.

We are here to provide education and guidance to the general public so that they can make simple, dignified and affordable funeral arrangements.

I just finished visiting all of the mortuaries because we have a bunch of cooperating mortuaries that will offer discounts to the Funeral Consumers Alliance. These mortuaries have all agreed that they will not pressure anyone into buying more than they agree to when they start planning. We get them to sign an agreement every January and February and the prices are in affect for two years until March 1st.

We started 62 years ago in Palo Alto. A member of the Friends’ Church (a Quaker church) was disappointed in the funerary options that she found because there was nothing simple enough for her Quaker upbringing. Everything added on and she had to choose among packages that built up expenses. So she got others involved in this and went around to the other churches to make talks from the pulpits. A co-op grocery store gave her a place to hold these meetings, and its been continuing ever since. The co-op grocery store has since moved and we are now based out of a Methodist church, although we welcome all faiths and all nationalities.

Credit: fcapeninsula.org

Kimberly: Have you noticed any recent trends in funeral planning?

Marjorie: There is an uptick in the number of people who can’t afford funerals. We don’t have financial help to give anybody, but we can offer options that are less costly. I always tell people that if they can’t afford it, they can always give the remains back to the coroner to have them taken care of them at county expense. This means cremation and that you may not be able to keep the ashes. Nobody wants to hear this, but for some people they will have to resort to this down the line. Prices are continuing to rise and many people do not shop around to look for savings.

Kimberly: Do you have any advice for people who would like to sign up to be an FCA member?

Marjorie: We take all forms of donations and we have set the price now for $50 to include one adult and one child under 18 for a lifetime membership. The membership is also transferable to another Funeral Consumers Alliance in the U.S. There are over 90 chapters throughout the country and they each operate a little differently.

Kimberly: Are there any commitments for members? Do they have to attend meetings?

Marjorie: Not so far! We do always welcome people at our meetings though.

Kimberly: What are the benefits of becoming a member?

Marjorie: You can look at our newsletters and our brochures and you will have a vote in our annual meetings. We may not be able to notify everyone who has ever donated to us about our meetings, but those who have donated at least $50 are considered members and we will keep them updated about our goings-on. We also offer books at a discount and a lending library that our members can access to find out more information about planning death and estate planning.

Kimberly: Are there any resources from the library or in general that you think would be especially helpful for people who are trying to plan funerals?

Marjorie: I always recommend for people to explore our website. One part of planning is for people with immediate need who have someone who is going to die this week. There are also those who plan ahead, which gives you more leisure to consider your options. You have to think about whether or not you are going to invest in things like insurance, and what the pitfalls of your investments will be. Many people move away and join their daughter or son and any plans they make in one place have to be changed and they have to start over when they move.

We don’t have financial help to give anybody, but we can offer options that are less costly.

In our most recent news-letter we have a warning about the dangers of pre-paying for funeral preparations. Pre-planning has to be flexible enough for eventuality and changes. Some people who have pre-paid for funeral preparations may not end up getting the services that they wanted, or they may have a hard time selling funeral plots if they move.

Credit: www.fcapeninsula.org

There is planning that should be written out. Go ahead and write your obituary—all except the end part. Someone else can write that. Just make sure that your relatives have the right dates and the information. It is important to leave behind a list of people to notify a list of all of your passwords and account information so your relatives can close your accounts or get any final information that they need.

We also sell a $10 kit that goes on the refrigerator and has a plastic pouch that has an advanced healthcare directive in it and a ‘before I go’ booklet that emergency people may look on the refrigerator for. We also sell a larger book, which you wouldn’t put on a refrigerator, that has a death checklist of everything that you need to plan for before you die.

Kimberly: Do you have advice for people who are planning funerals?

Marjorie: Shop around! We have an old survey of cemetery prices that you can get online and check out to start looking.

Kimberly: What about any advice for people who are preparing for the end of life?

Marjorie: Share your thoughts with your family. This is a major complaint that we hear. If you don’t talk about how you want your funeral to be planned then the people you leave behind won’t know what to do and they will have to start from scratch. Most people don’t have much experience for this—they probably have to plan one funeral in their lifetime. Anything that you can do to help them plan what they can do will be very helpful.

Go ahead and write your obituary—all except the end part. Someone else can right that.

Also, if you are leaving children behind, keep in mind that the majority rules. Before you go, you should get a consensus to make sure that everybody is happy with the funeral arrangements.

Kimberly: Thanks for your time Marjorie!

Marjorie: Thank you!

Related SevenPonds Articles:

• Healing Touches: Planning a Memorial or Funeral
• What is a Home Funeral? Reclaiming the Lost Art of Caring for the Dead and Having a Funeral at Home
• What is the Funeral Consumers Alliance? An Interview with Joshua Slocum