Luther Vandross’s Lyrics to “Dance with My Father” Inspire Hope

The first and only dance that I ever shared with my father was at my christening, before I could barely wrap my hand around his finger. Now, 20 years later and 17 years after his death, I still wish that I could share just one more dance with him.

This is the message that Luther Vandross communicates through his 2003 hit single “Dance with My Father,” which he co-wrote with singer/songwriter Richard Marx. Vandross, whose song is based on a personal experience, lost his father, Luther Vandross Sr., to diabetes complications when he was 7 years old. The lyrics recall childhood memories of him and his parents together, “Before life removed all the innocence.”

Despite the fact that the song was promoted very little due to Vandross suffering a stroke at the time of its release, this emotional tribute to his father is considered Vandross’s “career song,” and went on to win him “Song of the Year” and “Best Male R&B Vocal Performance” at the 2003 Grammy Awards. Since then the track has been replicated and covered by artists including country singer Kelli Coffey and “The X Factor” winner Joe McElderry.

Because of our similar histories, Vandross’s lyrics connect with me deeply.

“If I could get

Another chance

Another walk

Another dance with him,

I’d play a song that would never ever end.”

Even though the song is ultimately about Vandross’s relationship with his father, there are numerous references to his mother and the bond that all three of them shared.

“My father would lift me high

And dance with my mother and me…”

“Sometimes I’d listen outside her door

And hear how Mama would cry for him,

I pray for her even more than me.”

My dad dancing with me

Although I was not fortunate enough to spend as much time with my dad as Vandross did with his, these soulful and passionate lyrics have provided me with an outlet to release the sorrow and longing that I feel from time to time. For anyone who is struggling with the loss of a parent or guardian, Vandross’ lullaby hymn inspires hope that one day we will all be reunited on the dance floor together. And this time, I can hold all of my dad’s hand in mine.