Talking About Death and Releasing Fear

This person must talk about death openly.

Recently we spoke with Jon Underwood on the topic of Death Cafes. In the article (which you can find here), we discussed how important it is to have a safe environment where we can talk openly about death.  In this country, we are conditioned to believe that death is so intrinsically frightening that we should avoid discussing it at all costs. The author and contemporary spiritual leader Ram Dass, however, believes that having open discussions about death is essential if we are looking to fully embrace life and live without fear.

By denying death, we give it more power than it deserves and ultimately hurt only ourselves. Dass puts it eloquently, saying, “Like anything we seek to repress, the fear of death holds a particular, insidious power over our culture. Underneath our youth-conscious, death-denying veneer, we are, in fact, more morbid than societies in which death is confronted more openly.” Death, instead of being viewed as a natural part of life, becomes a monster we try to avoid until it inevitably claims us. At least for me, this does not sound like a positive worldview.

“Like anything we seek to repress, the fear of death holds a particular, insidious power over our culture. Underneath our youth-conscious, death-denying veneer, we are, in fact, more morbid than societies in which death is confronted more openly.”

Photo credit: Wikipedia

Talking about death and our fear of dying might sound like a challenging endeavor, but Dass attests to the power of open discussion himself. As his mother was dying from a terminal disease, he realized no one was willing to talk with her about her imminent death. He decided to take that chance and found that the open discussion soothed her worries and helped her ease into an otherwise frightening transition. “Though I’m not completely rid of fear,” he writes, “I can honestly say that from where I sit today, death does not terrify me as it did; on a good day, with my mind at peace, death and life seem almost equally appealing.” While we can’t all be spiritual gurus, it does sound as though taking a more open approach to death might lead the way for dismissing fear and inviting peace into our lives.

Related Articles:

• “I can say without speculation that it is possible to approach our deaths without the degree of emotional suffering that we’ve come to accept as a given in our culture.” – –Ram Dass (sevenponds.com)
• Accepting Death While Living Life – In The Book of Awakening, Mark Nepo lends some insight about accepting our ultimate fate (sevenponds.com)
• The Anthroposophical Perspective: Acceptance of Death in Life – The anthroposophical philosophy’s relationship Christianity and de-stigmatizing the dying process (sevenponds.com)