I’m long overdue to review the unquestionably seminal The Undertaking, Life Studies from the Dismal Trade, a book with an inside view of funeral homes. The work is written from the perspective of no less than a funeral director, Thomas Lynch. Mr. Lynch warmly opens his funeral home door to the reader, inviting us to see his world 100 percent from his perspective — including all of its nitty-gritty realities. The truth is, the nature of the funeral trade is such that those who practice it tend to lean heavily into what is termed the “late adopter” category. The late adopter can’t think out of the box whatsoever — and Mr. Lynch is no exception to this rule. I would argue that those who do learn to think outside of the box, like my former funeral director sister-in-law, for example, eventually feel propelled to leave the trade.
Thomas Lynch is the director of his own funeral homes, all of which are located in Michigan. And, uncannily enough, some are located in the same area as the Seven Ponds lakes (Oxford & Lapeer). It’s a very special place for me, as it’s not only where our site’s name hails from, but where I spent my summers as a child.
As is typical, funeral homes are passed through families. So naturally, Thomas Lynch’s late father Edward J. Lynch, a funeral director, has followed that tradition. He spawned children who work collectively with other family members at the Lynch & Sons Funeral Directors firms.
The book is an absolute treasure. Thomas Lynch is a gifted poet and reading his book is a pleasure. The work is divided into chapters, each covering a different, fascinating aspect of the funeral biz. Lynch ruminates about everything from his dad’s death, funeral costs and coffins, to his own death yet to come. All the while, he tells us stories and revealing historical facts with up-to-date statistics. All very interesting indeed.
But it is his delicious choice of words, in combination with his frankness, that keeps us riveted. He captures our attention from the get-go when he writes, “I am the only undertaker in this town (Milford). I have a corner on the market.” and holds it to the end; “Among the several duties of a funeral is, of course, the disposal of the dead for the living’s sake,” he writes. At times, I found his funeral director view-point a bit, if not fully, hard to swallow.
“One of the obvious attractions of cremation is that it renders our dead somehow more portable, less “stuck in their ways,” more like us, you know, scattered.”
– Thomas Lynch, The Undertaking
Back in the ’90’s, I actually had the opportunity to chat with Thomas Lynch on the phone. It was way before I read this book — so I must admit his curmudgeon attitude stuck with me. Was it simply a bad day for him? Or was it his inability to see that the future of the industry was about to radically shift? I am unsure. But I admit that my perceptions of him may have been tainted from his having brushed me aside and failing to take notice of my knowledge or vision of the funeral trade at the time. After all, it was the ’90’s. Cremation and the net have advanced quickly since then.
I believe Lynch’s book is an antiquated time capsule. In its pages, he captures a look at a trade that’s been in existence for decades, but is now dismantling, never to be back again – ever. The tradition of passing funeral homes on through families is changing, but I welcome those changes and our contribution to them via this web site.
Seven Ponds lakes is a mere hop, skip and a jump from Lynch & Sons Funeral Directors Homes. Yet, it is light years into the future of what death is now becoming to us.
I suppose that what I was unable to say to Thomas Lynch on the phone that day can always be written — as it is being written now, with a smile.
I often think about this schizophrenia, how we are drawn to dead and yet abhor them, grief places them on pedestals and buries them in graves or burns the evidence, how we love and hate them all at once; how the same dead man is both saint and sonovabitch, how “the dead” are frightening but our dead are dear.
– Thomas Lynch, The Undertaking
In the end, the art of writing about the less than savory funeral trade (or as Lynch calls it, the “dismal” trade) is accomplished with impressive eloquence. Thomas Lynch is a lovely poet and I highly recommend this book — it holds its position firmly as one of the top three reads on the funeral trade.
My other recommended reads on the funeral trade are:
- Joshua Slocum’s and Lisa Carlson’s book, Final Rights: Reclaiming the American Way of Death, is one part in-depth expose of all things deplorable and funeral, and two-parts step by step manual detailing the different states’ laws regulating this shadowy industry, which in some instances are so ill-conceived and ripe for exploitation as to verge on parody.
- If you’re unfamiliar with Jessica Mitford’s book The American Way of Death, it’s a complete exposé of the high-pressure tactics of the funeral business, written back in 1963. The book led the Federal Trade Commission to create the “Funeral Rule” law to protect consumers shopping for funeral services. Let’s just say for those who have not read it, it’s a historical must.
- Read about what I term Detroit’s “Death Triangle” of changes. How cryonics, aid-in-dying, and the state of the funeral trade came to be known.
- To locate a funeral director in the San Francisco Bay Area that is willing to think out of the box – check out our Local Resources section under “Funeral Services and Disposition.”