Laid to Rest in the Bay
Every month, the remains of hundreds of people are laid to rest in the San Francisco Bay. With the popularity of cremation pulling ahead of burial as a means for disposition of remains, the scattering of cremains (cremated remains) is becoming a daily occurrence at popular places like the Bay.
“There’s something calming about the water,” said Buck Kamphausen, the owner of six cemeteries and six crematories around the Bay Area.
The Orca III, captained by Curtis Brown, makes four or five private family trips each week to scatter remains, as well as trips each month to scatter the unaccompanied remains of about seventy bodies (such as those that were donated to medical research). Brown prefers a location off of Baker Beach.
“I go out near the ocean,” he said. “So, ultimately, the [remains] can be scattered on the tides throughout the world. It’s kind of a liberating, freeing thing.”
Brown also takes smaller charter boats and sailboats for scattering in the Bay.
The other company that offers this service in the Bay Area, the Neptune Society of Northern California, also makes almost daily trips for private family scatterings.
“Over the recent years,” Brown said, “I’m sure there have been more people scattered in the water than buried in the Bay Area.”
A number of people also do their own scatterings, laying cremains and urns to rest from the back of ferries or off of the Golden Gate Bridge.
The cremation rate in the state of California has far surpassed the national average—52 percent of people choose cremation over burial in the state, versus only 33 percent nationally. The funeral directors association predicts that by 2025, more than half of all Americans will choose cremation.
Americans are choosing cremation over burial for a number of reasons. The top five, according to a 2004 study by Wirthlin Worldwide commissioned by the Funeral and Memorial Information Council, are:
- It saves money.
- It saves land.
- It’s simpler [than burial].
- The body is not in earth.
- It is convenient.
Kamphausen notes that major attractions to cremation besides cost are its simplicity and dignity. Cremation allows a lot of flexibility in the way that a person’s remains are treated and memorialized—for example, scattering in the San Francisco Bay. This flexibility allows those mourning the loss to honor the deceased by determining when and where to lay their remains to rest. And the ability to be involved in the process can be therapeutic and empowering during a period of grief.
Sources:The San Francisco Chronicle
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Water burials are certainly increasing in popularity, and with them, ways to make the send off even more unique. One of my favorite water burial urns is the Peaceful Petals Flower Water Burial Urn. http://www.inthelighturns.com/memorials/peaceful-petals-water-urn.html This piece can accommodate hand-written notes on each of the petals, and dissolves quickly. It’s spectacular to watch the flower spread and slowly sink. And its so large! I just love this urn.
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I know most of my family wants to be cremated. I truly believe it’s so much better for our grief process, not to mention the environment.
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Thanks for your comment! Both of those are great points. I don’t know if a lot of people consider the empowering impact that cremation and scattering remains can have on the grieving process.
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I wonder if it helps the grieving process to go out on a trip with another family while they scatter their ashes?
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I feel like cremation is a much “freer” burial process as well if that makes sense. Our souls are supposed to be able to survive beyond our body and scattering remains seems to equate to freeing your body and soul back into the lifestream.
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One thing that cremation does is, if your loved one is cremated immediately after the death, is that it frees you from having to see him/her lying in a coffin. When my father died my brother proposed cremating him, to which my mom agreed to because she didn’t want us children to see him in a coffin. That, to her, was the ultimate trauma. She said that there is nothing can equal the pain of seeing your loved one lying dead in a coffin, and that memory will live with you forever.
We decorated the chapel with white flowers and greenery, and my dad’s lovely pewter urn was on a table in the center of the room, beside photographs that captured the essence of his personality. The table was surrounded by white blooming rose plants. All the memorial wreaths were lined up outside of the chapel; no cloying scent and clashing colors inside. Soft instrumental classical music played in the background. It was a serene, elegant and very memorable wake. To this day the memories I have of my dad are very pleasant and they include that wake.
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