SevenPonds’ goal is to render the end-of-life accessible as a topic of conversation in any context – and Thanksgiving is no exception. This year, we hope that you can help us debunk the notion that to talk about death means we inherently enter a negative space. It’s a sentiment shared by the University of Washington’s Michael Hebb, who started Let’s Have Dinner and Talk About Death. Hebb always “had many large dinner parties with the intent of creating social changes for a pleathora of topics — believ[ing] that “deep engagement and profound relationships create velocity [for these topics]”; he created a site where people can organize warm dinner parties that “draw people together and send them back out into the world with new insights on end-of-life topic[s].” So with all of the family at the ready, what better time is there than Turkey day to have dinner and talk about death?
“…with all of the family at the ready, what better time is there than Turkey day to have dinner and talk about death?”
Of course you’re going to talk about the “bird.” What time did you hafta stick that in the oven? You’re going to talk about about your work, the weather and the turbulence on your flight over — it was just terrible! — and all things trivial but inseparable from the classic Thanksgiving dinner banter. Americans know what to expect from Thanksgiving: it’s our quintessential comfort ritual, which is a wonderful thing. But it’s exactly why we’re suggesting you bring something new to the table this year through a conversation on death.
Ok, sometimes that’s easier said than done. But consider this: Hebb understands the potential awkwardness of this discussion and created an inviting website that serves as companion/step-by-step guide to creating the perfect, “deathly” dinner soiree; the site picks up on things like the age group of the attendees, your intentions (are you perhaps terminally ill? Is this for a loved one? Or do you just want to “live fully and understand that difficult conversations are sometimes the most liberating!”) The site even suggests books, movies and the like as tools for facilitating juicy conversation.
“Hebb understands the potential awkwardness of this discussion…”
Our final Thanksgiving offering? The Coda Alliance Go Wish Cards, which are a product of the Coda Alliance of our very own Silicon Valley. The cards create a game that offers yet another means to discuss death, with each card representing “the priorities people want honored at end of life” according to the organization’s Cindy Safe.
“The cards create a game that offers yet another means to discuss death…”
We wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with food, friends and family — and hopefully some new conversation starters!
Related SevenPonds articles:
- SevenPonds’ article on Let’s Have Dinner an Talk About Death.
- Our coverage of a Harvard study on what fulfills men by the end of their life
- Listen to NPR’s conversation series on the afterlife