Why Would Someone Keep Their Cancer Diagnosis Quiet?

The Princess of Wales delivers a recorded statement regarding her cancer diagnosis.
Credit:@KensingtonRoyal on X

After receiving a cancer diagnosis, it is natural for some people to want to share the news with friends, loved ones, and colleagues. For others, sharing much less information — or keeping their diagnosis a secret from some — is a more comfortable option. The recent events surrounding the Princess of Wales and her health has shown that as a society, we need to collectively learn how to respect an individual’s choice of how they want to handle their own health disclosures.

The Story Behind The Latest Kate Middleton Frenzy

For weeks, rumors swirled surrounding the Princess of Wales’ notable absence. Partially, this was to be expected; the media usually breathlessly covers Kate Middleton’s every move, complete with pictures and snarky fashion opinions. So when she quietly stopped making her usual appearances shortly after Christmas, the public collectively lost their minds. 

In response, Kensington Palace issued a statement on January 17th that the Princess had undergone abdominal surgery, and would spend some weeks recuperating in private. That seemed to soothe an anxious public, but only temporarily. Very quickly, social media was awash with conspiracy theories regarding Middleton and the possible reasons she could have for avoiding her usual duties. 

The now-infamous digitally edited photo posted on social media
Credit: @KensigntonRoyal on X

Knowing what she does about the public’s thirst for information, Middleton anticipated some backlash. The statement even said, “The Princess of Wales appreciates the interest this statement will generate. She hopes that the public will understand her desire to maintain as much normality for her children as possible; and her wish that her personal medical information remains private.” That, apparently, was too much to ask.

The internet gleefully reveled in coming up with reasons for why this photogenic royal would suddenly stay behind closed doors. We had all devoured images of her leaving the hospital immediately after the birth of her children, descending those steps with a full blow-out and in heels, no less. If she could look that good after just giving birth, what was she afraid of now?

Why Someone Might Not Share Their Cancer Diagnosis

There are a lot of reasons why someone would choose to keep a cancer diagnosis quiet. In fact, doing so is relatively common, for a wide variety of reasons. Some stay mum because they don’t want to worry friends and family. Others have a need to control the narrative, especially if there are business or financial implications. And some just want to experience a bit of normalcy by keeping people in the dark, according to Dane Schaab, a Behavioral Health Therapist at City of Hope Cancer Center Atlanta. “People will tell me the moment they tell someone they have cancer, they are treated differently,” Schaab says. “People don’t want to be treated differently. They want people to talk to them the way they always have. They want [to be able to] engage with others the same way.”

Controlling who knows about your cancer diagnosis can also be a method of self-preservation. “Talking about one’s medical condition can be stressful; doing so repeatedly can lead to a sort of traumatic experience for some people, constantly reminding them of the challenges, uncertainties and lack of control inherent in the disease,” says Dr. Jesse Fann, director of psychiatry and psychology services at Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center. 

Internet Conspiracists Should Feel Ashamed

For the Princess of Wales, the reasons for trying to keep her diagnosis quiet were  innumerable. As a public figure, this revelation came with increased scrutiny of her every move (if that could even be possible). It also came right on the heels of an announcement in February that King Charles was diagnosed with cancer, so there’s a chance that her silence was due to pressure from the well-oiled machine that controls the Royal Family’s public image. Middleton probably had a number of personal reasons for keeping her condition quiet, as well.

Under immense pressure from the public, on March 22nd the Princess of Wales released a short video explaining that her recent public absence was due to an unexpected cancer diagnosis. Showing incredible poise, Middleton thanked everyone for their ongoing support, and revealed that she and her young family were trying to process the news as best they could. 

Those who had been sharing conspiracy theories were suddenly silent. The statement worked: the public got their glimpse of the beloved Princess, and those who had been enjoying the frenzy couldn’t gloat over such a revelation. The shame is that Middleton was forced to share her diagnosis, regardless of whether she wanted to.

The takeaway for everyone who followed this story is that people have a right to protect their privacy. Knowing about a person’s cancer diagnosis is not our right, regardless of their celebrity status.