Giving Permission to Die

You might remember a couple months ago when we first talked about the chakras and the cleansing process that facilitates a more peaceful death.  The basic idea behind the practice is to rid oneself of all negativity in a holistic, meditative way so that we approach death from a place of love and forgiveness.  This, I believe, is an easy thought process to accept.  Who wouldn’t want to ease into the next chapter without the burden of life’s stresses?

This next aspect of the chakras might be a little more difficult to accept: giving our loved ones near death permission to die.  While that might seem counterintuitive — because naturally we want as much time with our loved ones as possible — giving permission to die is also a form of forgiveness.  According to the informative website, Dying Consciously, “Without giving permission to die, your loved one might cling to life for months, enduring unnecessary suffering and causing great anguish for the family.”  This is an important step in the Death Rites because it allows for the dying loved one to pass on without feeling guilt about leaving others behind.  By giving permission, the closest family members and friends can give that person a sense of peace as they near the end of their life.

“By giving permission, the closest family members and friends can give that person a sense of peace as they near the end of their life.”

Giving a loved one permission to die inevitably causes us to reflect on our own mortality.  Those who have the hardest time letting go are usually having a difficult time accepting their eventual death as well.  As noted in Dying Consciously, “Many times the family members who have the hardest time letting go are the ones who have the most unfinished business with the dying person or who are the most frightened of their own death.”  In this way, our end-of-life journey becomes intertwined with that of our dying loved ones, whether we fully realize that in the moment or not.  It takes acute self-awareness to let our loved ones go, to repair relationships while time remains, and to face our own mortality.  Giving a loved one permission to die is just one part of the process that enables them to pass on peacefully while propelling those of us living on to a place of acceptance.