Widows Who Love

When I think of modern day widows, I think of the three women who were touched by death, and consequently touched my heart in recent months. Beth, who is middle aged, was discussing business with me last week when I mentioned SevenPonds; immediately she revealed herself as a widow. Here we were, in a business meeting, when the subject of death suddenly opened the emotional floodgates between us. The next thing I knew, Beth was tearing up, choking — and we were left looking at each other through tears. Later I realized how much her emotions had surprised me. How raw it still was for her, 9 years after her husband’s death. He still lived in her thoughts.

Out of the blue one month prior, my high school friend Barbara had called, breaking 15 years of silence. She phoned to let me know she felt the need to reach back to our childhood connection. She was now a widow, informing me that her husband had dropped dead of a heart attack. Barbara wanted to assure me she had recently gotten herself through the initial few years of shock and grief, but still wasn’t ready to find new love. I could tell she was still working through her healing process and had not let go of her husband.

Back in January, I was visiting my Aunt Loraine, who lost my uncle Dick in her early 50’s, now 27 years ago. We were having our usual rambling conversation when she mentioned something that surprised her to admit. Just a few nights earlier, while dozing in bed with the TV on, she had spoken the words “Dick will you turn the TV off”…

In this recent reflection of three widows and their loves, I realized something about love and marriage. All three widows still have their partners in their hearts. I now understand: it will never end. In today’s world, we are more accepting of the continuum of life and death. Love, or the presence of someone who once was, will never end — no matter how many years may pass.