Newlywed Couple First Met As Child Cancer Patients

Lindsey Wilkerson and Joel Alsup first met in 1993. Then, they were both cancer patients at St. Jude’s Research Hospital in Memphis, Tennessee. She was 12 years old, and he was 13. Now, they’re a newly married couple who decided to get hitched at the same place they met 25 years ago.

Credit: nytimes.com

St. Jude’s has become an integral part of both Ms. Wilkerson and Mr. Alsup’s lives. Not only were they once patients, but now they’re also both employees there. They became coworkers just over 14 years ago, when Ms. Wilkerson began working in the event and patient-liaison department. Becoming coworkers enabled them to rekindle their lost friendship. They hadn’t seen each other since high school before then.

Ms. Wilkerson learned that she had acute lymphoblastic leukemia in 1991.

“I remember the terrified family,” said Dr. Melissa M. Hudson, the pediatric oncologist who first treated Ms. Wilkerson. Dr. Hudson is now a member of the St. Jude faculty and the director of its Cancer Survivorship Division. “She had lots of ups and downs in her treatment and she struggled with toxicity…She was a strong little girl.”

Mr. Alsup and his family learned four years prior that he had osteosarcoma, a kind of bone cancer. This led to the amputation of his right arm.

“Joel was seven years old, and he was having a hard time buckling his seatbelt, and I thought he was just messing around,” said his father, Bob Alsup. “We used to play catch with a tennis ball in the den, and I saw he was reaching for the ball with his left hand. I knew something wasn’t right.”

Joel, now 38, and Lindsey, 37, are now both cancer-free. However they are required to go through medical exams every five years to track their health.

“St. Jude saved both of our lives,” said Lindsey.

Love Not Lost

This unique love story began its course in 1993 at a St. Jude fundraising event.

“Both of our families were invited to speak and share our personal St. Jude journeys,” Lindsey said in an interview with The New York Times. “I remember being very impressed with Joel, he was really cute and he had a great sense of humor.”

Lindsey and Joel would see each other in the following years every so often, usually at other St. Jude’s events or overlapping medical visits. They lost touch when they both went off to college.

In May 2003 (the same year she would start working at St. Jude’s), Ms. Wilkerson got married. She has two children from that marriage, a 12-year-old daughter named Audrey and an eight-year-old named Jacob. That marriage lasted for 12 years until she and her husband divorced in 2015.

Credit: nytimes.com

Mr. Alsup said the day that Ms. Wilkerson came back into St. Jude’s was when their friendship began anew. “For the better part of 12 years,” he said, “we became the best of friends.”

They remained “just friends” through those years until roughly two and a half years ago when things got romantic. “We connected on the complexities of our situations, and how it changed the way we see the world,” Lindsey said. “We have this almost sense of urgency about living life, this gratitude, this desire to give back.”

Lindsey’s mother, Ginny Cook, said their family was excited when the two started dating.

“We’ve known Joel’s family as long as we’ve known him,” she said. “We were so pleased when they started seeing each other. He’s wonderful to our grandchildren.”

Like A Father

Lindsey and Joel bonded so well due in part to their shared experience with cancer and living in proximity to death. Their shared passion to give the children at St. Jude’s the same love and care they received as patients helped solidify their bond.

“Coming back to a place that’s so dear to our hearts has been one of the greatest honors of my life,” said Joel, who’s currently a supervisor in the creative media services division of the hospital.

Lindsey’s children also add another element to the couple’s sense of purpose. “When I became a mom, I began looking at these young patients as if they were my own children,” Lindsey said. “I used to think, ‘I know what they’re going through, I’ve been there,’ but having children of my own shook me like an earthquake, it really changed my perspective.”

Joel believes that his relationship with his stepchildren has allowed him to see things from a parental viewpoint as well.

“Lindsey’s kids are the same ages as we were when we received our cancer treatments,” he said. “Seeing them live normal lives means so much to us, and gives us a greater appreciation of our own parents, and all parents of children with cancer who deal with such difficult circumstances.”

Joel and Lindsey were married on September 1 at the Danny Thomas/Alsac Pavilion at St. Jude’s in Memphis.

It’s amazing to think that, at one point, it was uncertain whether these two would live into adulthood. And now they have a full life to continue with each other, and Lindsey’s children.